Monday, April 21, 2014

Elkagorasa's Cell Phone

Fantasy Apps!
What Smartphone apps would your character have on their ‘fantasy phones’ Azeroth? (source)


So, the goblins have just finished developing their wireless communication network, GobNet, and is now marketing phones. Elk is quite the bleeding edge kind of guy and has already bought one. It weighs 4 kilos, takes up 2 bag slots and has a smoke stack. 

Here's his top apps:

WhereToBoss?
This lovely little app is simply GobNet's GPS app. You put in the coordinates for your destination, which can be pulled from the 392 page un-indexed, unsearchable, online manual. You can download the manual, but you'll need to purchase the additional storage to do so. It will also point out all the goblin vendors along the way to your destination, make suggestions for hotels and inns ran by goblin caretakers.

BattleNet
This wonderous app is a side-load from the Alliance platform, but still works on GobNet phones. It provides up to date stats on arena and rated battleground matches. Teams are ranked and sorted by their composition, performance and faction. Pictures, previous year scores and team stats can be pulled up and sorted through. Unfortunately all information is posted in Human.

Talking
Head
Ever went to attack your enemy stronghold, had them yelling something at you, but since you didn't speak the language, attacked anyway. Next time open this app, and it will translate and auto-respond to your enemies for you. The PRO version of this app will automate responses to all other players. Got a player a little too drunk and spouting off their mouth, this little app is programmed with all sorts of smart remarks to kill performance hecklers.
Party
Ball

Raid hit a lull? Waiting for the healer to get back from a bio break? Break out the Party Ball and the fun never stops. Warning, will shoot off fireworks and aggro nearby mobs.
AMR
This vendor sponsored app provides detailed upgrade paths on how to fix your absolutely lousy gear. Want to run PVP gear while DPSing? This app will tell you how to enchant and reforge that gear to make it more viable. As an available add-on, you can download the virtual assistant, Zoopercat, that will interact with vendors automatically for you.

Pirate Bay
(aka pBay)
Making money is a snap,
when you load this handy app!
What's HOT, what's NOT!
and what should be bought!
...on The Auction House.....
Tank-less Job
Your 2/3 the way through the raid, when your tank's mom calls him home to bed. (Why do we get signal in here??). No one else is ready to end, so who you gonna call? 
Crafty's Crafting
Corner
Cantankerous Crafty is continuously concluding commotion in his communal crafting corner, causing conspicuous consideration commended to Crafy. Call on Crafty's Crafting Corner to cut-corners on all creations; cloth, copper or cakes. 
Pigeon
Feel the need to send short exciting messages to all your friends? Pigeon is an app that allows you to send short 140 character messages tied to the virtual legs of pigeons. Your friends will be excited to hear "Go #TeamHorde ! Alliance, you don't have a chance!"
HearthStone
Yeah, they play this game on their phones. Really! It's been around as long as GobNet has!

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